Feb 17, 2011 12:00AM

A Cyrus Crisis!

Alert! Billy Ray Cyrus is in trouble!

Billy Ray and Miley in happier times.

Stop everyone! There's a Cyrus crisis on our hands. Poor Billy Ray. Or poor Miley? We're not sure, maybe both. In a recent interview with GQ, Billy publicly admitted he's concerned for the safety of his daughter, Miley. Could it be the pressure of Hollywood? A love-crisis? A Linday-esque gaol experience? Nope. It's Satan, and he's attacking their family.

When the Cyrus family first came to Hollywood, they drove past a sign every day that said:
 

ADOPT-A-HIGHWAY

ATHEISTS UNITED

As Billy said, it was "A physical sign. It could have easily said 'You will now be attacked by Satan.' 'Entering this industry, you are now on the highway to darkness...'"

If Billy remembered his own words from 1992 ("Don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart") he might recall also saying "I just don't think you'd understand". Correct, Billy – you lost us a while ago. I think what's more poignant than Satan's intrusion into Billy's life is the invasion of the media into celebrity lives, and just how difficult it actually must be to cope with this. So, sorry for dissing on you Billy, you do have some of my sympathy. But this got me thinking about the whole notion of celebrity lives – and despite my childhood dream to be famous (for a talent I'm yet to discover) it seems like the downside outweighs the positives.

The clincher, though, is Billy's use of social media to address his reaction to the Miley/Salvia scandal. Tweeting his disappointment speech, "Just saw this stuff for the first time myself. I'm so sad. There is much beyond my control right now", is just too much. The day my dad knows what a 'tweet' is (aside from a birdcall, of course) will be the day I join the recorder section of the Australian Symphony Orchestra. But wait, it gets better. Billy's previous tweet read, "Oh wow ! I'm so excited !!! I tweeted follow Jesus and He showed up !!! I didn't know He was on twitter!!!"

Thanks for the laughs, Billy.

Airlie Winter-Irving

Latest


Tavi Workshopped Emma Watson's UN Speech

Although, not very well because busy.


See The Sugar Mountain 2015 Line Up

*Books a ticket to Melbourne*


Malawi Style Is Better Than Your Style

Photos by Kent Andreasen.


Meet Your Dream Music Video Generator

GIFs + Soundcloud = life changed forever.


Did James Franco Instagram His Junk?

Or was it Seth Rogen's?


Imaginary Dating Profile: Ex-Girls Dreamboat Christopher Owens

Partial to see-through. Not adverse to stalking.


Exclusive: Emma Mulholland AW15 'Cry Birdy'

Australiana meets Cry Baby.


ELKE SS14 'AMBROSIA' Collection

Greedy Goddesses and divine mayhem.


Watch Marques' Almeida x Topshop Collaboration Film

Then shop the collection immediately…


The Rap Sheet: October 2014 Edition

Your arts diary for the next month.


Know Your Trends: The Best Of SS15

Fashion Week themes we saw and loved.


Read Grimes' Lessons On Being A Boss

From Rookie Yearbook Three — on sale 21 October.


Lorde's True Identity Revealed By South Park

The truth was always out there.


Your Brain Thinks You're Ugly And Is Kind Of Right

Here's why you shouldn't give a shit.


Hitler Is On Tinder

Cool joke.


Social Snaps: Chopped Festival 2014

Presented by Levi’s in Newstead, Victoria.


Aziz Ansari For President

Here's why we love him.


Oyster Diary: People Of Paris Fashion Week

Part #2 of our street style observations.


Listen: The War On Drugs Cover Bob Dylan

Also Sun Kil Moon just released a diss track about them.