May 15, 2010 12:00AM

Two Seasons Too Late

2010 made Australian Fashion Week the sixth I've participated in since my first in 2004. I'm not counting my unofficial first- 2002- where mid-high school year I ventured out of the comfort of my parents' Perth home and across our great land just to be told I was too fat and, confusingly, too plain and too weird.

Thanks for the self-esteem boost guys, I also nearly failed school that year. My heart goes out to the little dolls I've seen at show castings ever since. The blisters from your baby-hooker shoes will heal but the ego-wounds won't. I'll give you the name of my therapist, say Tiah sent you. Oh... and I mean foot therapist, she does a great pedi. Don't even bother with the other kind.

Just like that social-climbing bitch at school - yeah, you know the one: insecure and nerdy but desperate to hang out with 'the cool kids' - Australia's fashion industry equivalents aren't above cutting to the bone with the cheapest possible blow in order to assert themselves. As what one would wonder? A part of the international scene? Good luck. Just because you can bitch out on a chick for having tits and an arse as good as Karl Lagerfeld can doesn't mean you can make clothes like him. And even it would seem The Kaiser's coming around to a bit of woman's-woman nowadays, booking the likes of Lara Stone and Claudia Schiffer for Chanel. Miuccia too, sending out Victoria's Secret models for Prada and Marc Jacobs pulling a similar act with Elle MacPherson at Louis Vuitton.

Surprise! And not just at the international collections' casting choices, but at the fact our country is still maintaining its tradition of not 'getting it' until two seasons too late. You'd think in 15 years we would've caught up. Or at least rebelled and begun a rebel faction in the cafeteria. But no no, as a collective we're still chasing along after the popular kids, repeating what they do and what they say (but with delay) in a desperate bid to fit in most of the time. I look forward to 2012 when this year finally sets in and we see at least a C-cup on the runway, or anyone over 21.

Written by Tiah Eckhardt. 

Image courtesy of Sonny Vandevelde


Interview: Damien Blottiere by Gadir Rajab

Art, Fashion and Beyonce choreography.

Kanye Recruits Miley For 'Black Skinhead' Remix

Because he is good at being famous.

Miranda Kerr Channels a 70s Porn Star For V Magazine

…one who gave speeches with an exposed breast.

Cara Delevingne to Feature in Grand Theft Auto V

Modelling, acting and singing just won't suffice.

Happy Birthday Andrej Pejić

The beautiful human turns 22. We raided his Instagram.

Interview: Foals

Jimmy Smith talks fashion, internet porn and Hanson.

Robert Pattinson x Dior Homme Fragrance

Broods like a professional brooder.

Mario and Luigi Parkour IRL

Super Mario Bros Parkour.

Kenzo x Vans FW13

Fancy some flying tigers on your feet?

Listen: Daft Punk's Spotify Playlist

Curated by one robot.

Exclusive: Karen Walker 'Forever' Eyewear

We interview the designer on creating the cutest campaign, ever.

Copycat: Shop 'Lost In Translation'

In honour of the films 10th anniversary.

Elle Fanning Hijacks Rodarte's Instagram

Posts pictures of dolls.

Exclusive: P.A.M. x Crumpler 'Stoned Mind' Interview

Nudism, mushrooms and a psychedelic hiking film.

Photographer Profile: Prue Stent

Gavriel Maynard shares the work of his friend.

Reality Bites the TV Show

"Hello, you've reached the winter of our discontent."

Watch: Nike 'Possibilities'

Feat. LeBron James, Serena Williams and Gerard Pique.

Watch: Chicks Who Love Guns 'Pencil Neck'

Shot by Oyster videographer Manuela Leigh.

Exclusive: Zara Mirkin x Teresa Oman x Stolen Girlfriends Club

The label's second 'The Fates' capsule.

Watch: Phoenix Teach HAIM French

Stupides américains.

Ali Michael x Urban Outfitters Special Collections 2013

Feat. Stolen Girlfriends Club, adidas x Opening Ceremony and more.

Listen: Tyler, The Creator 'Garbage'

From Grand Theft Auto V.

Win — Pedro Almodovar's 'I'm So Excited!'

From the cult Spanish director.

Oyster Playlist: Mac DeMarco

Top YouTube fetish videos.

Top 10: Throwing Shapes

Geometric Goals.

Interview: Charles Munka

We talk to the artist ahead of his 'Alternate Takes' exhibition.

adidas Originals x Run DMC x A-Trak: The Interactive Video

Voice commands, animations and New York City.

Social Snaps: Converse Get Loud

Disposable cameras vs. DZ Deathrays, King Khan, Palms and more.

Listen: LE1F 'Damn Son'

Fresh like downy, soft like chiffon.

James Franco To Host Show About Art

Here comes Franco Boo Boo.

Band of Outsiders x Rashida Jones

The 'Parks & Recreation' star and her sister get Sternberged.

Garance Doré Is Releasing a Book!

She's been blogging for seven years — it's time.

Listen: London Grammar 'Interlude'

Heartstrings will be tugged at

Watch: The Marina Abramovic Institute Will Be Excellent

She reveals a video of the prototype

'Past/Repeat' Shot By Caroline Mackintosh

The final instalment in our series profiling young creatives